I write this in the hope that everyone will soon be saying “Jeff. You’re an idiot. You got it all wrong.” So…here’s hoping that I got this all wrong.
1. The electors won’t do shit. They’ll ratify Drumpf. (✓ Dec. 19, 2016)
2. Drumpf will get us engaged in a proxy war with China.
3. The stock market will go even higher when Drumpf takes power. (✓ Dow hits 20,000 Jan. 25, 2017) The inevitable crash will be worse than 2008.
4. Social Security will be privatized for those under age X (50?). There will be a 401K-type of option where you can’t have direct access to your money but you can invest it in a Wall Street fund.
5. The Affordable Care Act will be eliminated (✓ House version passed on May 4th, 2017) and nothing will be put in its place.
6. We will accelerate the shift of public education to private education. ( ✓ DeVos made Sec’y of Education, Feb. 7, 2017)
7. If there are any infrastructure projects, they will be a public/private partnership, so that there’s always a private company that’s skimming money off the top and using inferior materials and non-union labor.
8. The trade wars will get very ugly. The American people, but not the elite, will be expected to make sacrifices of some sort so that we can win a trade war against (pick one or more: China, Mexico, India).
9. There will be more Carrier-type deals: half the jobs are lost but the taxpayer is still expected to fork over millions of dollars to the corporation, effectively reimbursing the company for keeping a few million jobs in the country.
10. The climate change deniers will have a wonderful time destroying the planet. (✓ Trump silences EPA Jan. 24, 2017) The hell with clean coal. We’ll go right back to dirty coal, and if we don’t burn it, we’ll mine it and sell it overseas so others can burn it.
11. The new Supreme Court judge will be to the right of Scalia. (✓ Neil Gorsuch, April 7, 2017)
12. The media will be attacked within days of Drumpf taking power. It will not be pretty. (✓ Jan. 21, 2017)
13. The I.R.S. will be shrunk to a fraction of its current size unless, of course, Drumpf can get rid of it altogether.
14. Rights, shmights. That shit is over. White power is back. (✓ Steve Bannon (former head of Breitbart) joined by two Breitbart alum Jan. 25, 2017. Sebastian Gorka, a Nazi, joins White House Feb. 17, 2017)
15. Fox News, along with all the other enablers of home-grown fascism, will be laughing their way to the bank. (✓ This has been happening for YEARS!)
16. KellyAnne Conway will be killed in a horrible plane crash. Others killed in that crash will be Newt Gingrich, Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, Paul Ryan, Dick Cheney,and Prince Reibus. The only survivor will be Ben Carson. (Not yet. Still hopeful)
17. Trump’s private plane will be carrying him, Mike Pence, and his family. It will fly around Manhattan trying to land. There will be a terrible fog. The plane will crash into the Empire State Building. There will be no survivors. (Not yet. Still hopeful)
18. Facebook will solve the ‘fake news’ problem. It will hire back the human beings it had replaced with crappy algorithms.
19. Jeff Bezos of Amazon will realize that drone delivery will put U.P.S. and U.S.P.S. workers out of a job, so he will decide not to promote this service.
20. Bloggers will finally make $100,000 a year, just like it says on those Facebook ads. (Not yet. Still hopeful)
I can go on but I’ll end it here.
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